A day or two after Kobi passed away; my husband said to me “I think Maggie sent Luke to us”. I had just written a little about Maggie in my last post about Kobi “A Good Life”. She was our lab mix who we got just before Kobi, and the two of them were best buddies. Maggie tragically died in 2004, leaving us and Kobi devastated and heartbroken. Later that year we got Cricket, Sheba, and Moses, which helped ease the pain for all of us.
Some of you may also have read that our puppy Luke was born on Maggie’s birthday, October 27th, which was a large part of how he came to our attention, and why we decided to get him. It touched me so much when my hubby said that, and I thought how true it probably was. Maggie must have known that Kobi’s time with us was coming to an end, and that all of us were going to need something special to get us through the pain of losing him.
My friend Kim always says that our dogs are “angels on loan” and I love that thought. That brought me to the thought that Luke was an angel sent to us by Maggie. It’s not that the two girls aren’t also helping us through this. But the girls are older, quieter, and more independent, not glued to our sides like Kobi used to be. Luke is constantly at our sides, he’s extra affectionate and he needs more of our time and attention than the girls partly just because he is a puppy. I think he is also helping them through this, by keeping them busy playing or keeping them company when napping.
Right now he is lying on the bed under my desk in the office where Kobi used to lay. He often slept there with Kobi. He can’t take Kobi’s place, but he can help fill the void left behind. I don’t have to look around and see an empty bed beside me where Kobi used to be. It makes it easier, and less lonely. I think Kobi stayed with us long enough to be sure that he had showed Luke all the ropes, and knew that he could go now, confident that Luke would take over some of his duties, like staying close by our sides.
Luke hangs out in the kitchen where Kobi used to often keep me company. He runs to the cabinet in the corner where the treats are, when he thinks it’s time to get one. That was first Kobi’s job, then Cricket’s, but sometimes Cricket is worn out from playing with her new brother and might be sleeping at a time they usually get a treat. Luke follows my hubby around when he’s carrying the treats to give them before he leaves for work, and smells his hand to be sure they are there. Kobi taught him that.
It’s not just Kobi’s habits….Luke also likes to lick the inside of his sisters’ ears, which is something our golden retriever Moses used to always do. However, he also has his own sweet little habits that make us smile. He likes to lick my legs and feet when I get out of the shower. He sits very patiently on the dog bed waiting for his meals to be dished out (Kobi used to bark impatiently at meal time). He wants to be on our laps and snuggling, or lying between us on the bed.
The other day I was sitting at my computer and Luke came up and sat next to me and stared. I turned to him and he put his paws up on me and I knew he wanted to be picked up and sit in my lap. That didn’t work so well….I managed to pick him up but he’s getting heavy! He doesn’t fit so well in my lap anymore either. So I left the computer and sat on the couch. He snuggled next to me and the girls came and snuggled on the other side of me. That was a time when my heartache from losing Kobi was very fresh, and that is exactly what I needed at that time. We sat like that for an hour while waiting for Dad to get home from work.
I can’t lie to you and say that Luke completely fits the “angel” profile. He is, after all, still a puppy (though 4 months old in just over a week!) and does have the devil in him also. He is learning to “come” but still chooses to pretend he has no idea what it means at times. He has been showing us how tall he is getting by reaching up and pulling things off the tables and counters. He drives his sisters crazy stealing the ball and running away with it when we are playing fetch. He thinks our cat Samantha is a dog and tries to play with her like she is. Somehow, even when I’m pulling my hair out, I know that is exactly the distraction I need to get my mind off my grief.
Kobi is an angel in heaven now, and Luke is our newest “angel on loan”, sent to help us along with his sisters. They are all here to help heal our broken hearts and mend our souls weary from the pain of loss.
Pup Fan says
I’m just catching up and I’m so sorry to hear about Kobi. Sending a giant hug your way.
Thank you….it is very much appreciated.
Oz the Terrier says
Miss Jan, Ma always says all dogs are our guardian angels, whether here on earth or in heaven. Ma always asks me “are you my angel, Oz? Did God send you to be my angel?”. I know exactly what she is asking…I give her that look that says “Yes woman! Now stop asking! How much reassurance do you need?”…So Luke is now your angel on Earth, probably sent by Maggie after some discussion OTRB. All we dogs want is to help you feel loved and cared for in this life.
Oh, Oz, you dogs are so thoughtful and loving in your taking care of us, you are so good at it. And you are so patient with our human doubts and need for reassurance! Thank you for those beautiful sentiments.
Donna O. says
I fully believe each dog is with us for a reason. Whether it’s to teach us something or to help us through a hard time. I’ve never heard the expression “angels on loan” but it is SO fitting.
I am really glad Maggie thought to sent Luke your way, and I’m glad he’s helping to cheer you up through this difficult time.
I also bet Maggie and Kobi are smiling down on you together (in between playing with each other of course). 🙂
Thank you, Donna. The thought of angels on loan seems especially appropriate when a dog is taken from us too soon. When asking “why?” it’s a comfort to think they were here for a reason. At least with Kobi he had a good long life with us, but that is difficult in it’s own way too….so it is such a comfort to think of Maggie & Kobi watching over us, and hoping for Luke and the girls to ease our pain.
M. K. Clinton says
That is such a beautiful thought and I don’t doubt it for a second. I hope you are doing better each day! <3
Thank you. It’s kind of up and down I guess, but a bit better each day.
Jackie Bouchard says
What a sweet post. Love that “angels on loan.” We felt the same about Rita, sent to us by her angel sisters. It’s true, the new pup doesn’t replace the other, but they do help patch up the holes in our hearts.
Thank you, Jackie. It’s such a comfort to think of our angels sending us someone to help us through our grief.
Sand Spring Chesapeakes says
Beautiful post and well said. Luke is your Angel on loan. May he brighten you day and your pain be less and less.
Thank you so much!
Pamela | Something Wagging This Way Comes says
It does appear that Luke learned a lot from Kobi. I’m so glad he has been a comfort to you.
When my first dog, Christie, passed, her sister Agatha was 14 years old. No puppy shenanigans to distract us. But it was a joy to see Agatha flourish at such an advanced age just from being an only pup. It made the loss of Christie just a little bit easier for us.
I hope Luke continues to bring you joy as your sorrow over Kobi mellows in time.
Thank you so much, Pamela. Every day Luke will do just a little something that reminds us of Kobi, and instead of making us sad it brings a smile. Every little thing that helps is such a good thing.
What a sweet post…..losing a pet is so terribly heartbreaking but I think Luke is “just what the doctor ordered” to help fill the void Kobi left in your family…..and what a wonderful thing that so many of Luke’s habits were “learned” from his buddy Kobi…..I know Kobi is probably whispering in Luke’s ear every day – keeping him on track – and reminding him and everyone that he will always be with you in your hearts.
Hugs, Pam (and Sam)
Thank you, Pam and Sam, for those kind words. It gives me so much comfort to think of Kobi being there whispering in Luke’s ear. Luke is really a good puppy, and there must be a reason for that! 🙂
I felt similarly when Bunny came home as well as Küster and Flattery. They were all young dogs who came in after a previous senior dog had passed away. All of them reminded me about the circle of life starting again and there really is nothing like puppy antics to help distract you from other things in life. I understood your post so well, and I’m so glad you have Luke there to bring some sunshine during this sad time.
I am so glad you could relate and understand. It took me some time to agree to getting a puppy, but now I know it was the best thing for us. And Luke has fit in so well, it really feels like he is the one that is meant to be here.
Love these thoughts in this wonderful blog, Jan-pics are great as always. Sad and heartwarming at the same time-more hugs your way to all.
Thank you, Sis.
Hailey and Zaphod says
While losing a pet is so hard, it is so nice that you found a new angel. He is lucky to have you!
If we can give him as good a life as we gave Kobi, then I think we are all lucky and blessed.
Ann Staub says
You know, this made me think of something I read on another blog. They had a pet psychic reading done and the psychic told them some interesting things about angels and their cats, something they had already felt before. I’m still undecided about the whole psychic thing sometimes, but I thought that was pretty cool.
I’m really skeptical about things like that too….but a part of me always thinks….why not? There has to be so much more to the universe than what we can see with our eyes.
Roxy the traveling dog says
I love that angel on loan. You need to read ” A dogs purpose” awesome book, and you will love it. I’m sorry about Kobi, you are in my thoughts.
Thank you so much. I think I have heard of that book, so I am definitely going to get it….writing it down now, thank you!
Wow. What a beautiful thought. I also love the “angels on loan” concept, and I believe you’re absolutely right. Our dogs take care of us forever, don’t they?
I’m glad you love the thought too. You are right, our dogs are there, right beside us, forever taking care of us.
2 brown dawgs says
I am glad Luke is there to keep you on your toes and hopefully keep you from being too sad.
When we found out we were going to loose our golden to kidney failure, we decided to make arrangements to get a puppy as quickly as we could find the right one. Luck would have it that Thunder’s littler was born in March and there was one puppy left. It worked out that that one puppy would come to live with us in May. Unfortunately our golden passed a month before Thunder came home so they never got to meet. I would have liked for them to be together for a little bit.
Thank you, Luke really is helping us a lot.
It’s too bad that your golden and Thunder never got to meet. Sometimes things seem to go just the way we want and others it’s the opposite. Who knows why?
The Island Cats says
We’re glad you have Luke to help ease the sadness you’re feeling about Kobi. Purrs….
Thank you, Island Cats, for thinking of us. Kobi loved his cats too, so the purrs are definitely appreciated and help.
My mom has called Katie Engelchen (German for little angel) since Trine died. She thinks Trine really helped Katie be the dog she became and taught her how to take care of Mom. I’m sure Luke is looking for Kobi and smells him all over still. As sad as it all is, the ones we still have really help to heal our hearts.
It makes me think back to the days when Shelby was our only dog, and when she died how empty the house was without a dog. I could never go back to having only one dog…the comfort the others provide is such a help to get through this. I think they are helping each other too.
Karen Cantlin says
Kobi taught Luke well. The picture of him and Sheba is so precious.
Yes he did! Luke really knows how to spread his love around, just what we need right now.
mollie and alfie says
We are so behind, we knew darling Kobi was poorly but we didn’t know he had gone with the Angels. We are sending you lots of love and hugs. Beautiful post and it’s amazing that little Luke can almost feel how you feel. He’s right there for you xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Mollie and Alfie
Thank you so much. Kobi went downhill pretty quickly, in a way that was a blessing so he didn’t suffer for long. Thank you for the love and hugs…it’s just what we need right now! xxxxxooooo
I love the “angels on loan” thought. Thank you for sharing it. And thank you for sharing this beautiful post.
I’m so glad Luke is intuitively comforting you. He may still be a little devil (puppies are always a bit of that) but it sounds like he’s got a good heart and a gentle spirit. What a wonderful thing for a puppy to have.
And that picture of him snuggling with Sheba? Melt my heart.
I’m so glad you love the thought and thank you so much for coming by to read my post.
Luke is definitely a sweet puppy….a few times now when I’ve been crying he’s come running right up to me and given me kisses. And he spreads his love around to everyone. The most precious photos I have are the ones of him snuggling with Kobi (which I shared in previous posts).
Jenna,Mark “HuskyCrazed” Drady says
wow what a beautiful post!
It’s so great to think of them that way “angels on a loan”
I know there is not much else I can say that i havent already said about your loss.
I am just so sorry, but I am very very glad that your pup is helping you through things, with his angel, and not so angel behavior lol!!
((Sending you big warm, fluffly, husky hugz))
Thank you so much for always stopping by and for being here for me….it’s not so much what you say, but just the fact that you say something…it means a lot to me. <3
I’ve been thinking of you a lot. I don’t like to hover, but I know how much you’re hurting right now.
This was another beautiful post, how can so much beauty come from pain?
I know all of your babies will gather close around you and help ease the ache in your heart, but puppies especially have a way of showing us that life goes on.
Jodi, I appreciate it so much that you are thinking of me. I don’t mind if you hover at all! Sometimes the worse thing when you’re grieving is when people just leave you alone, thinking you want that, but what you really want is to talk about the one you lost.
Thank you so much for saying my post was beautiful….I suppose sometimes the best creativity we might get is when it stems from pain….when we are feeling things more deeply.
You are right about puppies….it’s not just their sheer joy of life and fun, but the fact that they represent the beginning of a new life.